Welcome to the second insert from my book
9th July 2021
Decided to get an early start on things, I have many ideas swirling around my head right now and starting to feel ever so slightly overwhelmed. There is part of me that wishes I could just concentrate on my art practice/creative endeavors every day without the distraction of having to work in a bar part-time. Though I am fully aware that right now I need a little income to help cover things like rent/bills as well as money for art materials/film developing.
10th July 2021
Another day of finding it hard to push myself to get the energy to create, I know I shouldn’t be pushing myself, but I keep getting the horrible feeling if I don’t, I will just end up a pile on the floor of useless mess. I want to be able to focus as much attention on what I really love doing (art) as I do in these monotonous jobs I do just to bring some money in.
At least I have got to the point where I will say if I am comfortable or not doing certain task at work, I believe this to be important as I have gone way too many years just being “yea I’ll do that” to keep others happy and maybe less likely to lose my job.
I think you will agree with me this is an awful way to see things, but that’s the way I feel I had been conditioned.
The focus is now me, and I am happy I have come to this point in my life.